Building Better Relationships - 4 part series

Found this online and thought I would share.

Welcome to the Better Relationships 4-part series ! By Robert A. Rohm, Ph.D.
Today, is lesson 1, and lessons
2 through 4 will come over the next 3 days.

Better Relationships - Lesson # 1 of 4
Are You Aware?
 

By taking just a few minutes to read this mini-series on Better Relationships, you may very well become AWARE of things that will literally change the way that you relate to everyone in your life. That is a bold statement, but it is very true! Thousands of people have told me that this information was the turning point in their life in terms of improving their relationships.

What's the big deal...

Would you agree that your success in life is largely due to your success in working with other people? Let's put it this way, would you agree that it is more difficult to be successful in life if you are ineffective in working with other people? One of your greatest realizations in life is to recognize that there are some things that you do not know. As the saying goes, "You don't know what you don't know." Your "blind spots" are just that ... areas that you are "blind" to and just can't see. The things which hold you back may be the very things of which you are totally unaware. What if you could become AWARE of those things?

Discovery:

You cannot BEWARE of something,
until you are first AWARE of something!

This is the starting point of growth - to realize that you have not "arrived" and that you can still learn something that will make you a better person. You are obviously open to these ideas, because you are reading this first lesson. You are willing to become AWARE of some new facts. Congratulations! It will amaze you when you begin to see your relationships in this new light.

Our 4-part lesson has a modest goal - to start you on a new journey of personal growth by giving you a framework to understand yourself and others.

Here is what I want you to do ... and this is very basic and very quick to accomplish. It takes less than 5 minutes, but it will prepare you to receive the treasure of truths in the next 3 lessons that follow in this series. I want you to write down a few things about some of the most important people in your life. Why? Because, I believe that THEY are worth your effort to learn how to relate better to other people as you apply this information. Sometimes, we will only do something when we know that those we care about will benefit. In other words, even if we will not do what it takes to grow for ourselves, we will put forth additional effort, if we know that it will help other people. So, please fill out the information below with the attitude that anything that you learn in this series will make your most valued relationships even better.

Better Relationships: Growth Sheet # 1

a) ___________________________________
b) ___________________________________
c) ___________________________________


2. In your own words, write down a very brief description of each of their personality traits and what you think their greatest need might be.  This is NOT a test. Just write down what you think. You will refer back to this list in the upcoming lessons.

a)
　
b)
　
c)
　
3) Finally, write down the name, personality description and greatest need of one person with whom you have a very difficult relationship.  (Suggestion: pick someone who you deal with often.)

_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________________

What's next? Lesson #2 will be automatically sent tomorrow!

You will learn a new way to look at how to understand personalities and how other people act, interact and react in different situations. Congratulations, you are on a new journey towards BETTER RELATIONSHIPS! Stick with these brief lessons! You will be glad that you did. 1. List 3 people that are important to you in your life (There may be more, but let's stick with 3 for now).

Joel Osteen - May 27 - 2012 - The Power of Letting God

I was out of town for my BD celebration, but was fortunate to see Joel's sermon. 

Subject: Power of Letting Go.

You tried something, and it didn’t work; let it go.
If you keep wondering “why”, you’ll finally delve into self pitty or anger; let it go.
Let it go does not mean, letting your dreams go; Just the frustrations of not having it your way.
God knows better for you.
Maybe what you’re praying for is 2^nd best; let go and let God drive.
Anything you think you “have to have” can put you out of balance.
It’s ok to say, God, here is what I want, but God, I trust you in what you decide for me; Let go and know that God knows what’s best for you.
God often closes one door to make you closer to where he wants you to be.
Stop being upset when you don’t get your way, cause God has another plan.
What you might think is a set back, could be a “set-up” in your benefit.
God is directing you; let go and you will come into some extra ordinary !
If we push to make something happen and it doesn’t come through, you’ve got to learn to let it go.
When you go thru a loss (whether it be a person, a job, a home, etc), it ca be difficult; but let it go; Trust God; You’ll step into a greater destiny.
Gods ways are not always our way; Trust God.
Stop wondering, “why” has this happened to me.
Start letting go; when you hold onto the “old“, it will keep you from the “new“.
God is always “for” you.
Stop using your energy to find out “why”. When we don’t understand, don’t allow yourself to be confused or frustrated; leave it alone. There won’t always be an answer to “your understanding“.
Accept when a “chapter” is over; when God puts a period (.). Don’t live in self pity; It’s only a chapter in your book; Move forward; turn the page; your life is not over !
If you gave it your best and it doesn’t work, let it go. Put a period (.) to that chapter of your life ! Turn the page; go to the next chapter; move on; It’s not the end to your life, just the end of the chapter. Don’t put a question mark; release it; let it go. Don’t go around in self pity; Put on a new attitude ! Do your part and move forward. Your past is not as important as your future !
Quit morning over what you can not change. Another seed is in front of you; move forward into the “new”.
What’s too big for you; let It go ! If it doesn’t make sense, just let it go. Quiet your soul; Don’t be bitter !
God will take what was meant for you as harm and make this into a benefit for you.
A lot of things today, make no sense, but one day, it will look great !
God will take tragedy and open a new door !
Let go of trying to make it “your way”. Let it go; release to God.
God has appointed another seed; another victory for you; He will handle any injustice to you.
Step forward to your destiny. Let it go. Let God know, that you might not know what is going on, but you trust him.
Stop trying to figure out why this happened to you !
No one knows “why” anything specific has happened ! It might not be fair. But God is a fair God and will make it all right ! God is for you ! He will make up for the unfair.
Stop trying to figure out “why” it happened !
Tell yourself it is ok to not know “why” ! Don’t waste your time & energy to figure out the “why”.
We seem to want reasons; to make sense in our own mind. But create a file in your mind; an “I don’t understand it” file; just file there and leave it alone !
If you don’t, you’ll become bitter !
Remember, if God wants you to know, he’ll tell you. It is his privilege to conceal info from you. Don’t put a question mark (?), where God has put a period (.).

His sermon's are truly so great to listen to.  I feel he is always talking directly to me.  Many of his stories, I get so personally emotional over, such as this week, the Trade Center stories ! 

The power of letting go, is really a great lesson to learn.  In reality, we really have no power over any of our destiny; or at least, not God's destiny, unless we learn to let it go and let it all be as he wishes !   

Joel Osteen. May 20. God's Destiny For Your Life Will Come To Pass.

http://www.itbn.org/index/detail/ec/praXhwNDpdTYkdb_hlII3kVZdye-tvn_

Joel Osteen. May 13 - Accept People For Who They Are

(Sorry for delay in posting; I was actually out of town in Alaska)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6bDGldzwAw

Quote of the day by Robert Rodriguez

*  The challenge is what was making it exciting. You don't want to do anything that's too easy or that you know that you can pull off, otherwise it's really not worth doing.
*  Only by seeking challenges can we hope to find the best in ourselves.


Have you ever noticed about yourself, that if the challenge is actually too easy, you often work at the task slower than you normally would ?
You might even find it ultimately boring ?
Or merely value less ?

That's truly why our daily goals, we have personal control over, need substance, need action, need self value !

Joel Osteen May 12, 2012 - Shake off the guilt. Your sins have already been paid

Unfortunately, no postings on Joel next 2 Sundays.  I'll actually be sailing in Alaska !

(the short of his message today)

Change the channel; put your accomplishments on !
Jesus has paid your sins in full.
Ex. If you were unfaithful, he’s already paid in full.
The price has already been paid.
With his resurrection your sins are forgiven. All sins you made and have made have been paid for.
You don’t have to feel guilty. God knows every mistake you made; he doesn’t love you less; he loves you more.
He says, I’m not disappointed in you; I still believe in you.
Shake off the guilt; receive Gods mercy.

His commercial. Every day we live negative is a day we’ve wasted.

Today is Lumpy Rug Day (May 3) - How to Celebrate (and it’s meaning)

http://www.ehow.com/how_4995755_celebrate-lumpy-rug-day-may.html

Click Title to learn more about Lumpy Rug Day.

Peek under the metaphorical rug. How's your year going?

Shake things up. Maybe it is all about the rug.

Spruce things up.

Examine your beliefs.

Improvise.

From time to time, smooth out the lumps in your rug.

Avoid keeping a lumpy rug for more than 5 years.

Is today the day, to ultimately take time to look under your rug ?

Turning Your Victimization Around

Michael Neill has a great book, Supercoach, 10 Secrets to Transform Anyone’s Life.
His definition, from Victim to Creator: “When you act as if your experience is created from the outside in, you will experience yourself as a victim. The minute you take responsibility for creating your experience from the inside out, you reclaim your position as creator of your life.”
　
Through out each of our lives, realistically, we’ll experience additional obstacles for that we’ll have to face and overcome. Of course, unfortunately, you may have encountered specific horrific trauma that most have no personal experience of … Such as loss of a spouse, rape, mental or physical abuse, a tragic car wreck, loss of job, and certainly many others.

Yes, you may victim to one of these challenging circumstances. And Yes, you may often feel you are totally alone. Whether you feel you have no one to talk to about it or feel you are unable to share with anyone, or you feel, no one understands, in actuality, you have you !

Tip: Choose to take time helping others with their personal situation. When we focus on others, it helps us in dealing with our own !

If you use your time and energy to just dwell over the issue, it absolutely won’t go away ! More negative draws more negative your way, honestly like, bees on honey. You’ll discover, when you reach out towards helping yourself, it will change how you feel ! How you look at things !

The process of change begins with changing what “you believe”. If you believe yourself a victim, you’ll stay a victim. If you believe yourself as strong and standing tall, you will become this. Beliefs are internal, that’s why Michael Neill expresses that over coming victimization begins within, not starting with the outside ! And internal feelings come from your personal beliefs.

Another tip: If it means you must begin by just “pretending” you‘re no longer a victim, it actually works. Just like any habit, after 3 weeks to 30 days, it becomes a natural part of your life.

You are capable of pulling yourself through this ordeal. You must be pro-active; self involement.  Your first step can be to reach out to other sources, such as psychiatrist, counselor, coach, a great friend, and/or support groups; or through self learning, such as reading inspirational books or enrolling into self help classes.

Another tip: See yourself as, already having overcome your situation.

This weeks task. How do you want it to be a year from now ? Take out a piece of paper. Write down your circumstance. Now right down what you wishing for yourself, one year from now. Such as, if you want to loose weight, see yourself skinny now. If you want that better job, transform that job you want in your mind now. If you want to be out of that relationship, image your life happy a year from now and what you will be doing.

Whether you’ve never been in a victim type state or not, continuously reaching out in helping ourselves, towards having the best life we can have, is a life long work-out !