Worrying is torture. Take advantage of available resources & prolong “before it actually happens” worry !

Many times I decide to write on a subject, because of someone who has crossed my path.  Today, I want to talk about folks who pre-worry !

Most often, we “bring” added worry to ourselves that’s not necessary.  It’s human nature to worry unless you’re one of the lucky ones who has kicked that habit ! 

In general, worry is a habit.  It’s something we have allowed ourselves to do, whether you’ve been doing this for years, or it’s over a particular current situations.

Such as before we get on a plane.  Or before an operation.  Or maybe it’s because you thought you should have received an answer by now, so something must be wrong.

I’m NOT suggesting you shouldn’t be cautious over certain situations, nor letting your guard down and being care free !  I’m truly talking about situations you may want to let go, that is going on in your subconscious !

We often torture ourselves for no reason !  This added worry is bringing stress to our bodies, which is harmful !  Not only our blood pressure but to our organs.  And if you have a “mate” or family member or friend who worries over you because of your worry, it’s affecting their body and emotions too !

It can’t be difficult to stop our worry.  But with our “own choices” we can decide to lesson this worry !  Worry is a choice, that we are allowing inside ourselves !

We too often, make stuff up in our mind.  Can be because we don’t actually have the whole facts or because we are just letting our imagination run wild.  You can take control !

“If you knew how powerful your thoughts were, you would never think a negative thought” by Peace Pilgrim quotes. 

Let’s talk about situations that you have no control over.  Though we tend to worry, it’s actually wasted worry … Wasted energy.  For example, maybe your job is about to do a lay off.  Instead of worrying over being without a job and money, choose to use your time and thoughts and picture what you might want to do next with your life. 

Maybe you or someone you know, is about to have some medical test done, over “what could be”.  Again, choose not to think negative before the results are in. 

I’m actually a firm believer that negative thoughts can bring on negativity.  We imagine something bad and that bad actually happens.  This is why I believe we all need to NOT form negative outcomes in our mind. 

For example, I hate snakes.  Often I will picture that snakes will be at a place I am going or in a situation I’m about to be involved in.  I find I do this more at night, when about to go to sleep.  I must quickly shake that thought.  Either I get up and go watch something on TV or I begin to think of something pleasant (change my thoughts).

There are available sources to help you when you find yourself overcome with worry.

So many folks turn to God. “ Help me Lord, to not bring this added worry to myself”.  The words alone do help.  But you must also believe !

Affirmations and positive imagery does help.  “Everything is going to be alright” and then picture this !  When you picture negative, this can get stuck in your subconscious and will continue to bring you down.

Self-Hypnosis is another tool.  Find a place that is quiet.  Begin by relaxing.  Tell yourself, your head is relaxing; your chest; your arms; your stomach; your legs; your feet and toes and ankles.  Sit there relaxed.  Begin to imagine a beautiful scene.  Whether it’s a place you’ve been, like on vacation, or somewhere you wish to be.  Take 15 minutes to an hour and just take yourself to this place.  It allows you to focus on something other than your worry.  And you can include in this Self-Hypnosis, positive affirmations.

Getting the “facts” is another way to help you avoid worry.  So many folks listen to friends or to made up info they have allowed to enter their subconscious, rather than turning to facts. 

Such as, if it’s …

*A medical condition, turn to your doctor or the nurse.
*In reference to travel, call your agent !
*Past bills due, turn to the one you owe !

 

Choose to STOP making stuff up in your head ! 

Choose to STOP turning to the wrong resources for your answers !

And choose to STOP avoiding the answers, by putting off getting the facts !

 

 

FYI ... I'm not suggesting everything will be ok, when you get the factual answers or avoid pre-worry ... I'm only suggesting you put worry off till it's totally real !  Cause everything could turn out ok, and you wasted your energy for no reason !

 

 

 

 

 

Give It Up: Top 10 Worst Foods by Lisa Mosing

Give It Up: Top 10 Worst Foods

By Lisa Mosing, MS, RD, FADA, Special to LifeScript

Published October 21, 2011

 

1.       Chips.  Substitute:
Rice and popcorn cakes are no longer Styrofoam-like snacks.

2.       Non-Dairy Toppings (coolwhip). Substitute:
Top desserts with low-fat vanilla yogurt.

3.       Doughnuts.  Substitute:
Keep down the carbs with whole-grain bagels.

4.       Fettuccine Alfredo.   Substitute:
Request whole-wheat fettuccine with marinara sauce.

5.       Pork Sausages.  Substitute:
Chicken or turkey sausage.

6.       Fried Chicken.  Substitute:
Grilled, skinless chicken breasts are finger-lickin’ good.

7.       Imitation Cheese in a Can.  Substitute:
Go for the real thing.

8.       French Fries.  Substitute:
Order kid-size fries instead

9.       Soft White Bread.  Substitute:
You may as well have a candy bar.  You can also substitute whole grain bagels, English muffins, scones, and muffins.

10.   Fried Wontons.  Substitute:
For a little crunch, try brown-rice sesame crackers.

 

What's Your Diet Downfall?
You already know if you're a junk food junkie or a sucker for bread and butter. You know if you've got a sweet tooth or a salty incisor. So what else is there to know about why your diet isn't working? Find out if you're unwittingly sabotaging your weight-loss plan and adding inches to your waistline with this quiz.

http://www.lifescript.com/quizzes/food_and_diet/whats_your_diet_downfall.aspx

 

Here’s rest of article

http://www.lifescript.com/food/healthy_eating_guides/low_fat/articles/give_it_up_top_10_worst_foods.aspx?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=relationship&utm_content=6008905527944&utm_term=1

 

 

 

Are you conventional ? Non-conventional ? Leading with your subconscious ? The difference can make or break success.

Today is Memorial Day.  I decided to take little quiet time and begin reading the first 5 chapters of a book written by Colin Christopher … Success Through Manipulation.

To some, the visualization of the word “manipulation” may be seen as harsh or scary.  However, his book is more about manipulating your own mind.  The way you think.  The way you see things.  How most folks are allowing their conscious mind to be in control, even when it is hurting them !

Colin provides 5 free chapters online and if you want to read the rest, you will need to purchase his book.  Over my next few entries on my blog, I plan to summarize his 5 chapters.  If you decide you do not want to wait for my next summary, you can locate his book online or go here:  www.SuccessThroughManipulatonBook.com

 

Mental tools for the Laws of manipulation.

These laws of manipulation are affecting you, daily !  Your thoughts, beliefs, and habits.

If you keep thinking and doing the same, you will have the same outcome.

To change, you have to change your thoughts, beliefs and habits.

Begin by thinking successful !  Then you’ll become more like the successful !

How do successful people think ?

Through out his book, he will refer to the “Conventional” and “Non-Conventional” thinker !

Conventional is predictable and instinctual; what is socially acceptable.  The poor to average person is conventional.

Unconventional, consciously evaluates the environment and people.  This is how high performers think.

Laws of manipulation is determined by your differences in thinking.

Conventional thinkers think manipulation is bad.

Unconventional, do not think the word is bad.  It’s the “outcome” of whether it’s negative or positive.  It’s the “action” that you take.  It’s how you use manipulate to make an outcome, is what is  positive or negative.

For those who think they don’t they ever manipulate … If you drive, you are manipulate the steering wheel of your car, or you will crash.

If you want to be successful, the Laws of manipulation can create better results and better success.  Choosing to change your thinking can be difficult.  However, The Laws of Manipulation can change your thinking. 

 

Chapter 1

How your mind Works !
The Law of Subconscious Habit.

Your subconscious forms habits.

The subconscious is like the hard drive on your computer.  It stores information.

It responds to stimuli that comes from instinct or learned experiences.

The conscious is not aware when you respond habitually to your subconscious.

The subconscious only perceives and responds in the present.

Your subconscious will continue to respond the same way, unless you change it.

Example.  Unless you change the program on your computer, the same info will keep coming up.

Your subconscious provides real and imaginary.  It does not know the difference.  Therefore, what you think and imagine programs your subconscious.

Learn more by reading the “The Biology of Belief” by Dr Bruce Lipton.

Think about tying your shoe laces.  At first, you concentrated with your conscious mind.  Today, your subconscious naturally ties these laces without even thinking about it.

When 1^st driving, again you concentrated, on doing everything right and not wrecking.  But today, driving is natural for you.

These 2 examples are real stimuli.  Now think about imagine stimuli.  You’re watching a scary movie.  There is nothing in the room that can harm you, yet you are clinching your teeth or possible shaking, with one eye closed.  This fear is your subconscious.  Your subconscious is responding to fear.  It’s an habitual response.  Imagined fear yet real response.

Conventional thinks spend most of their time performing habitual responses.  What they have allowed to get into their subconscious is what is controlling most of their lives !   There’s very few experiences that can change their thinking.

Conventional thinkers are actually followers.  They are slaves to their habits.  Stay more in the drone-zone (same ol’ same ol’ stage).

Unconventional thinkers are usually leaders and creators.  They spend their time gaining new experiences, through physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual development.  Their thinking evolves and changes over time.  Provides new programing for the subconscious.  Producing new habits for new results.

Thought Manipulation Exercise for Today:

Identify your habits.  What do you do automatically without thinking, such as brushing your teeth, fixing dinner.
List good habits and bad habits.
What part of your day is performing habits and what part is related to new experiences.  Are you spending more time in the “drone-zone” or taking advantage of new & different experiences ?  Are you taking advantage of evolving and improving ?

Plan to change the percentage of your time that you stay in the drone-zone, to taking advantage of new experiences.  Observe your results.

 

That’s the end of Chapter 1 for today !  Stay tune for the summary of Chapter 1.  And don’t forget to do your exercise above !

 

 

 

 

 

Could your procrastination or disorganization be affecting others’ lives ? It’s been said, you don’t care !

As we all know, there’s those who are fairly organized 24/7 and on time, and those who are the total opposite.  Yet, there are so many aspects of all over our lives that requires that we be on time !  The #1 one requirement is usually work.

Our jobs need us to be on time for many reason !  In reality, tardiness affects everyone. 

1)      Being late, often causes others to have to stand around till the late comers “decide to” arrive ! 

      2)      Not only loss of time, there’s company money (possible bonus)

3)      And … To show respect of others time/money !

 

An article from CBR, Creative Business Resource:

“What does tardiness do to a company?  Does it really make any difference to anything?  Do happy employees with relatively unstructured days truly produce more effectively?  Is widespread, chronic tardiness of any major concern to the welfare of the company or even to the welfare of the staff?

Although not customarily acceptable in our society, chronic, minor tardiness is largely ignored in most companies, but tardiness can be a sign of significant productivity loss, of employee low-motivation or satisfaction, and of ineffective or unhealthy management techniques.

If that employee is 15 minutes late every day, his direct cost to the company would be $4,692 per year, based on a 48 week work-year for lost productivity.  Of course, in all likelihood, that employee would expect to see at least a $5,000 annual raise in his pay envelope for the next year (if the company’s lucky).  What a coincidence!  Management already gave it to him and just threw it away!”  And folks wonder WHY companies can’t give you a raise !

You can view the rest of the article:

http://cbri.com/tardiness

 

Another article, Professor’s House-life-home-memories:

“Chronic tardiness problem … Put you in a perpetual state of chaos and haste, but you may convey a message to friends and coworkers that you do not value their time … a sign of disrespect!

When you make a commitment to another human to show up for work at 9 AM or meet at the local coffeehouse at 10:15, you are telling them – yes…I’ll be present to meet and spend time with you. With your job, you are establishing yourself as available for work, production, listening, and critical thinking. With a friend, you are allowing shared time for talking and listening, perhaps even problem sharing. When you are late to arrive, you cut into that promised time because something else has captured your body and mind.

This “something else” keeps you from holding your commitment to another person, and it is keeping you from them because you choose to let it. Yes, you alone allow that other ‘thing’ to control you and that is what prevents you from keeping an appointment.

Please note, once you are late over and over again, you are giving yourself this label … A label that you do not have the respect of others to be on time.  If you are sitting there saying that you do have this respect, then also know, unless YOU CHOOSE TO PROVE IT, then others will then determine your action on their own !

You not only does being late cause havic in your own life, you are causing it for others.  You cause others to get behind on their schedule.  Just the fact that you are late, causes added anxiety for the person waiting !

If want YOU ARE CHOOSING TO DO affects others, then it’s not only your life you are affecting !  And just cause folks don’t tell you, they could be just trying to hold down their anxiety from getting worse than it is !  Or they’re not bringing it up, cause they are possibly tired of hearing themselves repeat this to you over and over, for you to NOT HEAR IT ONCE AGAIN !

If you say you don’t really care what others think ?  WE ALREADY KNOW THAT !  YOU’RE LOUD AND CLEAR !  You don’t choose to respect others and you come 1st.

You can view the rest of the article:

http://www.professorshouse.com/Relationships/General/Articles/Being-Tardy---A-Sign-of-Disrespect/
 

Ready to stop habits ?  A Life Coach can help you with tardiness, procrastination, and organization if you truly want to change … Whether it’s for the benefit of others or to help make your life less hectic !

 

 

Predicted that more men will watch this season of the Bachelorette

Some folks love "reality shows", yet others to do not.  For those who don't ... Consider being open minded, especially if you enjoy opportunities to learn a few of life's lessons for FREE.

Even if you may not learn what you should do, you can take advantage of what you SHOULD'T DO, while watching "reality shows" !

For example "Wife Swap".  On almost every show, their are opposite types of families.  It many cases, one of the families is probably like your family.  And on almost each show, both sides learn something from the experience.

On this seasons Bachelorette, Boston.com predicts more men will watch.  If they haven't thought of it, I truly believe they should consider !  It ought to offer a lot of FREE COACHING lessons/tips.  The DO's and DONT's in courting !  The DO's and DONT's of what women like and don't like !

Here's Boston.com article.
http://www.boston.com/entertainment/tv/2014/05/15/the-bachelorette-reasons-why-this-season-may-the-best-one-yet/zopt6Ock8ZqLKXqcEcXP9H/story.html

If no other reason for guys to watch .... There's Andy !


Enjoy !

Time Management - There never seems to be enough time !

Time.  We seem to have so little of it !

In most cases, you have more than yourself to take care of and consider !  Sometimes it can be a pure juggle in getting everything done !

Often, just changing a few habits can help save you a little time !  You would be surprised how a little Time Management can make things run more smooth.  Here's 2 for today !


How many times a week do you open mail at home ? If more than twice, consider saving more of your time, and schedule select days to open.

How many times a month do you pay your bills ? If more than four times, consider saving yourself time, by scheduling only one day a week. To save even more time, consider only the 1st & the 15th (or such days).

No parent wants to believe that their child is a bully. See article written by found of P.U.R.E., an organizationt hat helps parents with struggling teens

 

“How to know if your child or teen is a bully at school”. 

Written by Sue Scheff, an Author and Parent Advocate. She founded Parents' Universal Resource Experts in 2001. P.U.R.E. is an organization that helps parents with struggling teens. 

http://www.examiner.com/article/how-to-know-if-your-child-or-teen-is-a-bully-at-school

Truly, bullying needs to STOP !  We all remember what it was like to be in school !  It doesn't go away by ignoring it.  We wouldn't allow someone to kick our dog !  Why do we allow someone to kick our kid ? 

Our children are our next generation !  We need their self confidence to build and help lead us, not have it torn down by bullies ! 

We need the schools to be given permission to help stop this !  Kids need to be praised for "telling" when another bullies them.  And the child being bullied does not need to be punished along with the bully !

Great reading. Procrastination. You or someone you know ? How it developed ? Who’s the enabler ? It affects health and EVERYONE they encounter !

In general, we all procrastinate once in a while.  Whether it’s putting off that one task you don’t want to do, till the end of the day, or letting a couple of weekends go by, not wanting to face that garage.  However, if it’s a DAILY encounter, it’s putting you at different level of procrastination than the norm.

Is Psychology Today’s description/defining you or someone you know ?

“They don't pay bills on time. They miss opportunities for buying tickets to concerts. They don't cash gift certificates or checks. They file income tax returns late. They leave their Christmas shopping until Christmas eve”.

The article continues to say:

·         “Twenty percent of people identify themselves as chronic procrastinators.

·         For them procrastination is a lifestyle. And it cuts across all domains of their life”.

 

It also states:
“As a culture we don't take it seriously as a problem. It represents a profound problem of self-regulation. And there may be more of it in the U.S. than in other countries because we are so nice; we don't call people on their excuses ("my grandmother died last week") even when we don't believe them”.

One of the world’s leading experts on procrastination, Dr Ferrari (associate professor of psychology at De Paul University in Chicago), identifies three basic types of procrastinators:

·         “Arousal types, or thrill-seekers, who wait to the last minute for the euphoric rush.

·         Avoiders, who may be avoiding fear of failure or even fear of success, but in either case are very concerned with what others think of them; they would rather have others think they lack effort than ability.

·         Decisional procrastinators, who cannot make a decision. Not making a decision absolves procrastinators of responsibility for the outcome of events”.

 

Also stated:
“Procrastinators are made not born. Procrastination is learned, but not directly. It is one response to an authoritarian parenting style. Having a harsh, controlling father keeps children from developing the ability to regulate themselves (internalizing their own intentions and then learning to act on them). Procrastination can even be a form of rebellion”. Though a parent may have not tolerated the procrastination, through teenage years and adulthood, the procrastinator is more than often enabled by other family members, friends, co-workers, and their boss, who don’t know what else to do, other than tolerant their excuses.

Procrastinators enable themselves as well as do those around them:

“Procrastinators tell lies to themselves. Such as, "I'll feel more like doing this tomorrow." Or "I work best under pressure." But in fact they do not get the urge the next day or work best under pressure. In addition, they protect their sense of self by saying "this isn't important." Another big lie procrastinators indulge is that time pressure makes them more creative. Unfortunately they do not turn out to be more creative; they only feel that way. They squander their resources.   Procrastinators actively look for distractions, particularly ones that don't take a lot of commitment on their part. Checking e-mail is almost perfect for this purpose. They distract themselves as a way of regulating their emotions such as fear of failure”.

There are big costs to procrastination.

·         “Health is one”. During a college student study, it left evidence of compromised immune systems; more colds and flu, more gastrointestinal problems. And insomnia.
·         “In addition, procrastination has a high cost to others as well as oneself; it shifts the burden of responsibilities onto others, who become resentful”; requiring more worked hours or at a faster speed; often causing you to be late and not meeting your work or personal deadlines; leading to more stress; personal sickness.

Procrastinators often do not consider themselves to the extreme of this article.  Nor do they believe procrastination has anything to do with their health.  Nor could they possibly be affecting those around them to such a depth.  Whether the procrastinator chooses to face it or not, this article from Psychology Today, clearly states, “Procrastination destroys teamwork in the workplace and private relationships”.  And those around these folks, need to stop enabling them or it will continue to affect your live and your work-place.

Know that procrastinators can change their behavior with the help of a psychiatrist or coach or hypnotherapist.  It takes dedication and lots of energy !  And it takes highly structured cognitive behavioral therapy.  

If you have a boss who is enabling a co-worker as this, consider sharing this article !  Not with vengeance but with compassion !  Not only will you be helping this co-worker, though they may not see it this way, isn’t it about time to consider your own stress, your own work load, your own job, your other enabling co-workers ?

 

Don't let your situation define you ! It's in your hands. See video, Ugliest Woman in the World

Great video.  Must see.  Ugliest Girl in the World.  Motivational Speaker.
http://clashdaily.com/2014/01/labelled-worlds-ugliest-woman-lizzie-velasquez-knows-god-sees-true-beauty/#70jiDo7P9wTauHJS.01